Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Halloween Teacher Breakfast

At our elementary school, we have a guy called "Bike Dude." Bike Dude is in charge of all of our "Walk and Roll" days, which is the one day each month when kids are encouraged to walk bike or scooter to school. Whenever the Bike Dude's kids graduate from elementary school, we get a new Bike Dude. It's like the new Darren on Bewitched:


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Everyone just pretends that this is the only Bike Dude that ever was and the kids don't seem to notice (a sign that all grownups look the same to kids). I've been a parent at the elementary school for so long, I'm on Bike Dude number three. Since the Baby is in kindergarten, I'll probably be looking at Bike Dude five or six before I'm done. Instead of saying, "I've been a parent at this school for nine years (!)," I can just say I've been there for "five Bike Dudes."

So, last year I pledged to volunteer less this year, and I almost succeeded. Yes, almost. After going an oddly long time without any contact from the room parents in the Boy's class, I asked around and learned that due to various issues, all the room parent volunteers, save one, had quit. Quit?! I am kicking myself for never realizing that this was an option! Here I was thinking that being a room parent was like indentured servitude, and that, once committed, I was obliged to serve for a year until I secured my release.


Friday, October 17, 2014

Soccer Match Predictor

I'm sure that some of you, like me, will be attending your kids' soccer matches this weekend. I've discovered that sometimes all you have to do is observe the opposing team and their fans to figure out how a game is going to turn out. I've prepared a test that predicts for you whether it's going to be consolation Powerades at QT or celebratory ice creams at DQ. Answer the questions and check your score at the end of the quiz.

1.  Goalkeeper

The opposing goalkeeper is warming up before the game. +1
The opposing goalkeeper is warming up before the game and has tattoos and visible facial hair (male or female). +2
The opposing goalkeeper is warming up before the game and looks like this:

+10

Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Least Sexy Inspirations for Sexy Halloween Costumes

Halloween is just around the corner and I am SOOO excited to see all the people dressed like Ebola doctors in their Tyvex suits:

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Of course there will be the inevitable sexy Ebola doctor outfits:

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The post-exposure spray down is what makes it sexy. It's just like the water scene in Flashdance:

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Friday, October 3, 2014

Update: Atlanta Botanical Garden is Getting a New Restaurant!

Well, apparently I am more influential than I thought because right after I published my scathing review of my e-coli salad from the Atlanta Botanical Garden, I read in the AJC (well, Mom read it and dropped off the article) that the ABG is expanding and the plans include "a two-story restaurant, with a dramatic view of Midtown Atlanta" and salads that aren't black and slimy. It's true! The restaurant "will use many locally sourced foods, including produce from the botanical garden's own edible plants exhibit." Yes! There are also plans to redesign the children's garden, which was last renovated in 2002.

The ABG has undertaken a new capital campaign to raise the $40 million needed for these improvements and is already more than half way to the goal. Anne Cox Chambers, a trustee and longtime supporter of the ABG has pledged $9.6 million. Can you imagine having that much money? Good for her for spending it on something that the community will enjoy instead of a wedding or 225 Hermes Birkins painted with naked demons:

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