Tuesday, November 27, 2012

That's My Baby

The Baby (which is rapidly becoming a misnomer) turned four years old today. She wanted three things for her birthday: a scooter, a rainbow unicorn light up Pillow Pet, and a Little Mommy Doctor Mommy Doll (not a typo). The lucky girl got all three gifts and was so completely and honestly thrilled and excited that even I can't be snarky about it. We haven't tried the Pillow Pet's light up feature yet because it requires three AAA batteries and who has those things just lying around? I did have some AA batteries, so we were able to get Little Mommy Doctor Mommy up and running, and the Baby and I immediately regretted her ability to talk.

In case you do not have a four year old child, let me briefly describe the doll. The doll "interacts" with the child by telling the child about her ailments and the child is able to then treat the doll with the medical instruments. Sounds pretty innocuous, right? This doll is like every old lady that used to hang out in the lobby of my grandparents' apartment building in Philadelphia and complain to anyone who would listen about her aches and pains. She seriously kvetches endlessly to the point of hypochondria. A sample of her chatter:
"*cough, cough* Mommy, I feel yucky. Am I sick? My ear hurts, Mommy. Are you gonna check my ears? Is there a boo-boo in there? Make it better, okay? *cough, cough* I've got a sore throat. Are you gonna use that tongue depresser? I don't feel so good. Can you make me feel better?"
After this last statement, her forehead starts glowing bright red.

"Owie. My ear hurts. Do I have a fever? I'm hot. Are you gonna check my temperature? I don't feel so good. Do I need the purple medicine? I'm hot. I feel yucky. Mommy? Do I have a fever? Are you gonna do that thermometer?" 
I hated to tell the doll this, but if your forehead is glowing, there's not much the purple medicine or anything else, short of a head transplant, can do to help you. The doll went one round of her complaints and the Baby had had enough.
"Turn her off, please, Mama. She talks too much." 
Disclaimers all around, the Baby really wanted this doll and Dad obligingly purchased it for her at my request. Any errors in judgment are entirely mine. She is also utterly charming when her switch is in the off position. I do think it is kind of hilarious that someone invented a doll that does something that most people find annoying in humans. For their next trick the creators of Little Mommy Doctor Mommy Doll will bring you a doll who chews with her mouth open, fails to signal when she changes lanes, and tells the same boring stories over and over again.

I enjoyed going to the Baby's school where they celebrated her birthday with much fanfare. Y'all there is a special place in heaven for preschool teachers. I would last maybe a day with a class of 14 three and four year olds before I turned to drink. The Baby got to make her ideal birthday cake out of felt:


The Baby and I have similar cake-decorating skills which is why her birthday party cake will be from Publix. Here's the birthday girl getting ready to blow out the candle on her cupcake.


I always let the kids pick their birthday dinner and the Baby, with much encouragement from the Boy chose Chick-fil-A. Now, I realize that ole Truett Cathay made some statements with which some of you may disagree. I may feel the same way, but I cannot quit Chick-fil-A. It's as simple as that. If my children's eating out options were a Venn diagram there would be about two places in the overlapping region and one of them is Chick-fil-A. Also, the employees are always lovely and the restaurants are very clean. I don't care how everyone and everything got that way, I just like that they are. I'm sure this makes me a terrible person, but what can I say? My bad.

Mom joined us for the dinner and even sweetly picked up the children's food. Despite my impassioned defense of eating more chicken, Mom and I opted to have something more grown-up for dinner. I had a ton of roasted vegetables left over from Thanksgiving, so I decided to make them into a soup. This was actually Sister's suggestion and she is a far better cook than I am, so I trusted that it would be good. I had roasted carrots, parsnips, butternut squash, and sweet potatoes a la The Barefoot Contessa, who I love. Here's the recipe.


I just threw the whole mess into the food processor. I sauteed half an onion in some olive oil and tossed that in, as well. I added chicken stock to thin the puree, because, as I discovered, there is a fine line between baby food and soup and that fine line is chicken stock.


Once it was all pureed and thinned to a soupy consistency, I put it in a pot to warm and seasoned it with some salt, pepper, and nutmeg.


It was actually palatable which was a relief because I didn't have any other options. After dinner we had more cupcakes and the Baby was thrilled with her special day. Yay!


In other news, the Boy got irritated by the Baby getting too much attention and tried to take me down. In related news, don't take pictures of your legs from this angle. 


 Tomorrow I am going to be decorating mailboxes for Children's Healthcare of Atlanta. I'm meeting my decorating partner bright and early and I'll be sure to take lots of pictures of our beautiful creations. Night!


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